


Miss Secretary

by AshsHorrorShow



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Basically Namie Makes It Hard To Keep Secrets, Established Relationship, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Namie Just Wants Money, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-17
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-16 15:50:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11831958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshsHorrorShow/pseuds/AshsHorrorShow
Summary: Keeping the secret of his and Izaya's new relationship from everyone was pretty easy. Well, everyone except Izaya's goddamn secretary.





	Miss Secretary

After a few months of constantly going back and forth between one another’s apartments- sometimes to fuck, sometimes just to hang out - Shizuo was now ready to tentatively call this little thing he and Izaya had going on a ‘relationship.’ However, just because he was finally able to come to terms with the idea, didn’t mean he was ready for the rest of Ikebukuro to know just yet. After all, how was he supposed to casually confront his friends and the rest of the town about it? Like, ‘Hey remember the guy who I was constantly trying to smash with vending machines because he was hellbent on making my life miserable just for a laugh? Well, yeah, we’re dating now. Don’t ask any questions.’ 

He highly doubted they would accept a lackluster answer like that.

Hell, if he were in their position, he doubted he would accept that kind of answer either.

Since they wouldn’t be satisfied with just that, that meant Shizuo would have to answer questions. Questions that Shizuo himself didn’t fully know the answers to. Like what started this? When did the relationship officially begin? WHY did it begin? 

Even if they didn’t ask the hard questions, Shizuo didn’t particularly like the idea of random people prying into his life. Izaya was nosy enough, thank you very much.

So Shizuo did everything in his power to make sure to keep their relationship on the down-low. This meant no PDA and if Izaya stepped foot into Ikebukuro, they had to play their standard game of cat and mouse in order to keep up appearances. The few times they went out to eat, they would take a cab to Kanto, where no one knew their names or faces as well as they did in Ikebukuro.

Thankfully, Shizuo didn’t have to worry about Izaya spilling the beans about their relationship either, seeing as the flea seemed just as determined to keep it hushed. Izaya might be infamous in both Shinjuku and Ikebukuro, but he still did like a sense of anonymity Shizuo knew. It was why, even though he could dress nicely, Izaya never wore anything too flashy, keeping to his trademark black and browns. He wanted to blend in with the crowd. It made his job as an informant easier or something like that. 

If word got out that he was dating Shizuo Heiwajima of all people, he would be part of public scandal for God knows how long. There would be no hope of being under the radar then. 

Plus, their relationship being public would no doubt attract enemies of Izaya into attacking Shizuo to get back at the informant, and Lord knows that the bodyguard didn’t need anymore of that bullcrap in his life. And while Izaya would never admit it, he knew the informant to grow at least a mild sense of concern for Shizuo’s safety, judging by the way he seemed to insist on patching Shizuo up whenever up he got an injury of some kind, no matter how shallow the cut was. Izaya could insist he didn’t want stains on his carpet all he wanted, but Shizuo knew better.

So to avoid causing any sort of trouble, they kept their relation under wraps, at least for now. So dedicated were they on keeping it quiet, that neither of them had even told any of their siblings about it.

Keeping the whole thing secret was easy for the most part. But there was one person Shizuo was beginning to think keeping the secret hidden from was going to be impossible. That being Izaya's secretary, Namie Yagiri.

Shizuo never saw this coming. He figured out of all the people in the world who would begin to suspect something, it would be Celty or Kasuka or the Orihara twins. Never her. Never Namie. 

Shizuo knew very little about the woman, as he’d only seen her a handful of times. He could honestly say that she was a very pretty woman, but that was about as far as he could go with nice things he could say about her. Otherwise, he found himself mistrustful of her. He didn't know what it was. Maybe it was the way she gazed at everyone and everything with a look of apathetic annoyance, as if they were an inconsequential bother. Or maybe it was the when she spoke. Whenever she talked to him, her tone was so cold and curt it honestly felt like he was being constantly condescended to by a particularly mean teacher, even if she wasn't saying anything too harsh. She creeped him out in a way. She seemed like the type who would poison someone’s coffee and watch them slowly die without a flicker of emotion showing on her face. 

He didn’t know what Namie had done as an occupation before she decided to sell her soul for good by working with Izaya, but he figured whatever it was, it had to be bad. Anyone who was willing to work for the louse had to be at least a little evil.

Admittedly, Shizuo knew he was being a bit immature right now. While he still stood with his earlier points, he knew the main reason he held such distaste for her was because she made his life inconvenient. And that wasn’t really her fault. She was just doing her job.

But good lord was she a pain in the ass to try and avoid. 

Her irregular work schedule kept throwing him off. Some days, she would only be in Izaya's apartment until noon. Other days she worked until ten p.m. Some days she was in and out within a few moments, just to drop off a few papers or something menial like that. Other days, she would be cooking dinner for Izaya for Christ sakes!

Because she had such an erratic schedule, Shizuo could never figure out when she was and wasn’t in. So whenever he walked into Izaya’s apartment, and she happened to be there, Shizuo then was left in an awkward situation where he had to come up with an excuse of what he was doing there. 

It had been easy at first. All he had to do was say he was there to kill the flea. Namie would usually not even look up from her papers and say that Izaya was out, dryly telling him that if he was going to camp out at the apartment, to at least wait until she left before trying to kill him because she did not want to be crushed on account of her boss. Occasionally, she would threaten to pepper spray him, saying that she got her paycheck today so she couldn’t have him killing her boss that day. 

If Izaya happened to be gone from his apartment, Shizuo would usually just walk out of the apartment after her comments, acting like he was too impatient to wait. If Izaya happened to be there, he would chase the flea out until they were out of earshot before he finally felt safe to talk.

Her erratic work schedule even affected what time he got up in the morning if he decided to spend the night at Izaya's place. He never knew how early she was going to arrive at work, so a lot of the times, he had to wake up at the crack of dawn in order to try and avoid being spotted by her.

However, despite how much he tried to avoid her, he met her often enough that he was sure she was beginning to get suspicious. After a while, she had began making comments like, “He give you a key yet?” or snidely talk about how he was pretty bad at catching Izaya at his own apartment. Her comments were making him edgy.

It had gotten to the point where he often found himself texting Izaya, asking if she was there or not. However, this wasn’t always a reliable method as sometimes Izaya would lie and and say she was gone, just so he could get a cheap laugh at Shizuo’s expense when he had to face her again. Those encounters would usually end with him legitimately trying to chase and crush Izaya if he happened to be in the apartment. 

But one day, it finally ended. 

It had all started when Shizuo forgot to set his alarm. But who could blame him? He had a break off of work for a while, so he decided to spend it hanging out with Izaya and generally enjoying himself. After a nice dinner with one another, the two of them had wound up spending the rest of the night enjoying themselves in the bedroom, so to speak, before they finally were both exhausted and promptly fell asleep wrapped up in each other. Shizuo had been such a state of bliss at the time… and Izaya’s bed was just so comfy… it was reasonable to assume he wouldn’t be thinking about Namie or waking up early. However, when he woke up alone in bed to the sound of Izaya talking to Namie about something or another, he cursed himself, scrambling to get up and put on his clothes.

Fucking Izaya hadn’t woken him up because he thought it would be oh so hilarious. He could practically see the informant smirking right now. All those fond feelings he had held for the guy last night were temporarily out the window as Shizuo gently and slowly crept out Izaya’s room, trying not to make the creak the floor to noticeably and hoped that the furniture was keeping him covered.

He debated how he was going to get out of here. Was he just going to have to camp upstairs the whole day in Izaya’s bedroom? If the informant left him alone, that might not be too interesting. Sure he had a nice TV up there but there was only so much he could watch before-

Suddenly, he heard Namie sigh and say, “Will you stop torturing him already, Izaya? SHIZUO! I know you’re up there. Come on down already.”

Shizuo felt his eyes widen and his heartbeat pick up in pace. What?

Seeing as he had clearly been caught though, he slowly came down the stairs, feeling vaguely like a guilty child who'd been caught by his mom, where Namie was waiting, arms crossed. Looking at her, he slowly began, “How did you…”

“Please, it got pretty obvious after the sixth time you visited. You’re not the best actor, Shizuo-kun,” Namie said, which caused Izaya to suddenly start snickering. Shizuo glared at him. He opened his mouth to say something but Namie continued, “To be honest, even bad acting aside, I held some doubts. Thought that maybe you were asking Izaya for a job of some sorts and you didn’t want it to become public knowledge or something like that. However, one day, I decided to come early and get all my work done because I wanted to go on vacation with Seiji. Before I started working though, I decided to go to the bathroom. As I got done in there and began leaving, I suddenly saw you walking into Izaya's kitchen. Naked."

Shizuo immediately blushed while Izaya let out a crow of laughter. Shizuo was feeling a swarm of emotions, not sure whether he was more angry at Izaya’s laughter or embarrassed by the fact that Namie of all people saw him naked. Oh god…

Namie didn’t help his embarrassment by narrowing her eyes and saying, “Thanks for the traumatizing experience by the way.” Shizuo could feel his blush deepen.

Namie waved her hand dismissively and said, “Saw you get a glass of milk or something and drink it before you walked back upstairs. I waited a little while, trying to see if you would drag Izaya’s dead body out of the room or something like that, but you just came out fully clothed and walked out. A few moments later, Izaya came out acting all normal and by that point I knew you guys were fucking or whatever.”

Shizuo still found himself stunned into silence. Namie looked at him for a moment before saying, “Don’t worry by the way, I’m not telling Ikebukuro. Don’t know who’d believe me, first off, and besides, I don’t really care what my boss gets up to so long as I get paid and he leaves me alone.”

Izaya smiled pleasantly at that as he said, “We have a very close relationship, Namie and I…” 

Shizuo felt a modicum of relief that Namie wasn’t planning on spilling the beans… when suddenly, a realization dawned on him that he had to have answered. Turning to the secretary, who was now beginning to pad over to her desk to get to work, he said, “Wait a minute… the morning you er, saw me… did you… ask Izaya what happened?”

Without looking up from her papers, she said, “Yes.”

Gritting his teeth, and glaring at Izaya, who was smiling like the cat who got the goddamn canary, he said, “And he knew that you knew?”

Once again, without looking up from her now seated position, she said, “Yes. He told me not to tell you about it though. Said it would be funny to watch you scramble and-”

Her last statement never got heard as Shizuo let out a bellowing, “YOU BASTARD!” and immediately began to chase after Izaya, who was already halfway out the door.

As she heard the destruction going on in the hallway, she sighed, resting her head on the palm of her hand and said, “Why is everyone in this city so weird?”

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, I love Namie so much. 
> 
> Don't have much to say on this one. It got inspired by the fact that I see a lot of Shizaya fics where they hang out at Izaya's apartment, and Namie is always mysteriously gone from the picture until Shizuo conveniently is out of the apartment... so I decided to make a fic counterbalancing that.
> 
> As always, critique is wanted, and I hope you enjoyed.


End file.
